Opinions Editor Jake Hunn points out how absurd BuzzFeed lists are.
By: JAKE HUNN
Opinions Editor
Lists are offensive. Let’s face it, BuzzFeed’s infamous list format is an insult to the comprehensive ability of the average reader. Organizing topics into a numbered list with a headline followed by a short explanation implies that the audience does not have a sufficient attention span to keep track of what is already mindless subject matter.
BuzzFeed’s topics are pointless. In most cases a BuzzFeed article simply draws attention to concepts that are already generally accepted as true. The hope is that the reader will connect with the content through the illusion that it has led them to a new realization. In a recent article titled, “26 Things Only Perpetually Tired People Will Understand” BuzzFeed’s first item on the list reads, “It doesn’t matter where you are or whether there is a bed around or not, you will be able to fall asleep if you try.” Surely this is an obvious truth, but someone who consistently feels tired might think, “Hey, that’s totally me.” In reality, it is common sense that someone could fall asleep in any location if they were tired enough.
Despite what the entire internet seems to believe, there is such a thing as too much nostalgia. BuzzFeed is the number one culprit in nostalgic overkill. The online media outlet can’t seem to move past their obsession with nineties culture and creating a bubble of superiority for it’s millennial readers to confide in. Every other BuzzFeed article seems to be titled along the lines of “26 Arbitrary Things Only 90’s Kids Will Understand.” Sorry, Millenials, “Being Free of the Crippling Grip of Responsibility” is definitely not a childhood commodity that exclusively 90’s kids can reminisce on. Surely anyone over the age of 18 could look back fondly on such a time in their life.
How about the disturbingly broad quizzes that BussFeed publishes that claim to categorize someone as person in a matter of a series of questions that typically don’t exceed ten in quantity. What’s even more horrifying is that people actually get excited about their results. It is hard to believe that BuzzFeed can dertermine that “You’re a person of the people. You tend to get along with everyone, and you tend to find yourself having to sneak out of uncomfortable situations from time to time. But hey, that’s life” based on a person’s love for the cartoon Recess.
BuzzFeed’s most recent trend seems to be lists of characteristics in which one checks off all that apply. At the end of the activity, BuzzFeed will inform you just how much you embody a certain identity. This one is self-explanatorily absurd. If someone cannot decide their identity by evaluating a set of characteristics on their own, perhaps BuzzFeed is the perfect match for that person.
